Thoughts for the night

I have totally forgotten about this blog. When rotations started, everything got horribly crazy but now that I am on an off session, I remembered my long lost blog lol. This probably won't be long but I'm shaking the writing rust off lol. Well the story of my life right now is working on seminar and prepping for residency applications and interviews. I hate having to go through this process once again but really want the opportunity. Nonetheless, being the control freak that I am, it's stressing me out. One of my preceptors said I was the typical type A personality and besides the rudeness and aggressiveness toward others part, I can totally see it with being highly competitive, ambitious, and a perfectionist. I think what keeps me grounded is my relationship with God. Whenever I feel like things are getting out of control in my mind, I get on my knees. That's the quickest way to make it stop.
Not having control over the future or knowing what's going to happen makes me very uneasy. My prayers lately have consisted asking for peace of mind. That's one of the greatest gifts God has given me (besides salvation of course). His peace is undescribable. One of my favorite verses is John 14:27 which says "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."
God showed me his peace in two ways recently. And I don't care if no one believes me when I tell you the following story. It happened as sure as I am sitting here typing right now. I was up til 4 am about a month ago working on a presentation for my rotation. I had prayed for awhile that day because I was reaching my mental limit and was afraid I wouldn't finish by the next morning (I did thank God). I layed down at 4:30 when husby was getting up to go to work and this feeling came over me. It was like a warm, extremely peaceful feeling, I can't even begin to describe. Then the entire room filled with lights. It was almost like strobe lights. It was so bright in my room, I could barely see and I felt like I was floating off the bed. Then it was gone. Don't ask me exactly what it was because I have no idea and I have had the dream before, (that was the 3rd time). I just know I felt better. Then last night as I was praying and asking God to work everything out and take the worry away I flipped my bible open and it landed on Matthew 7:7-11 "Ask and it shall be given unto you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh, it shall be opened. Or what man is there of you, whom is his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?" It was perfect timing, as usual.
The last verse I want to share is John 16:33 "These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." So my advice is to go to God immediately when you're troubled. People always try everything else and then finally, when they've exhausted their options, they go to God. Go to him first! You'll sleep better:) I promise. God bless each of you reading this and I just ask that you remember me in your prayers. I want to be put in the position where I can help the most people and use the gifts God has given me. Good night all.
Oh! one more thing. I have an absolutely awesome book recommendation to leave you with. Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers is so amazing!